First, let me say thanks to all the people who visited my blog this last week and read my very first post! I would never have believed that I would have over 70 people would find my blog this quickly - and one of them even got back to me to say that they read "What Every Body is Saying" on the strength of my recommendation and loved it. I would be happy for comments to be posted here, and that if you consistently like what you see, you can subscribe as well! To answer the question for those who asked it, I will update my blog each week on Wednesday.
And now, to this week's post (in case you couldn't guess based on the subject line, it has to do with understanding what a person's eyes are telling you):
In
my opinion, a person's eyes give us more perspective into a person's
actual thoughts than any other feature. As I referenced earlier, body
language tends to indicate intention, but the eyes tell you what is
actually going on in the mind.
I recently performed an
experiment with a young couple, where I asked them to hide a coin and
I would try to find it, using the clues given to me by their eyes
alone. I told them that one of them was to always lie to me, the
other to always tell the truth. The one who chose to be a liar was
to hide the coin while the honest participant had their back turned.
I gave them a nickel and left the room as they worked out their roles
and hid the coin. When I returned, I was able to quickly ascertain
all the relevant facts of the situation and announced who had hidden
the coin and where it was - all by paying attention to the eyes.
Before
I continue, I would like to explain briefly how the two hemispheres
of the brain work. The left portion is analytical, factual, and tends
toward the literal. The right side is creative, less anchored to
reality and prone to imagination.
I
recognize that this is only the most tenuous of descriptions, but it
forms a sufficient foundation to allow this explanation of eye work
to continue.
What
I wish to discuss is how the eyes of the young couple in the anecdote
above reliably conveyed everything I needed to know to deduce the
location of the coin. In effect, their thoughts betrayed them.
Before
we continue, if you are in a room full of people, I want you to ask
someone to think of their home, and to visualize themselves looking
for their shoes. If you are alone, you can do this yourself.
Take
a minute and try it.
Now,
if you were by yourself, notice what your eyes are doing - what
direction did they move? And if you were with a person, asking them
where they put their shoes, what did you notice about the direction
that their eyes moved?
You
should have observed that when someone was asked to visualize a real
situation from their memory, their eyes will have moved up and to
THEIR left (This will be the case for roughly 95% of people, with the
remaining 5% shifting in the opposite direction).
From
your perspective, they will have looked up and to the right.
What
just occurred was that the brain went digging around the left
hemisphere of the brain for the information that was queried. The
eyes froze in position while that information was found. It is a
little bit like when your mouse turns into a clock while the computer
is loading something.
Because
factual information was being sought, the eyes displayed that the
left hemisphere was being accessed. Similarly, if you ask someone to
hear something that they have heard before, like a song or a prior
conversation with an individual, they will look to directly to THEIR
left. From your perspective, their eyes will look to the right.
Interestingly,
if someone is ever deep in thought and actually having a conversation
with themselves, their eyes will present down and to THEIR left. From
your perspective, they will be down and to the right. This will often
be the case when someone is reflecting seriously upon an issue and
could be in need of advice.
A
quick recap:
Visualizing
something that actually exists: Eyes move up and to their left.
Hearing something that actually exists or occurred: Eyes move to
their left. In conversation with the self: Eyes move down and to the
left, using the analytical brain to weigh options, etc.
At
any rate, the eye access cues used above are displayed when a person
is dealing in the realm of reality, with things that are tangible and
that exist.
The
opposite eye movements are displayed when someone is creating or
imagining. Eyes moving up and to the SUBJECT'S right indicate that
they are creating something that does not exist. Similarly, eyes
moving to the SUBJECT'S right are listening to something that does
not exist in their realm of actual experience.
Not
everything is opposite here, however - there is a difference. When
someone has eyes that have shifted down and to THEIR right, they are
FEELING something, rather than in conversation with themselves. They
are accessing the kinesthetic storage vault.
At
any rate, armed with this information, you can easily use a person's
eyes to determine whether they are using the literal or the creative
portions of their brain.
When
I worked with the couple described in the experiment above, I knew
that their eyes would tell me who was lying. I then had a casual
conversation with them and watched their eyes. Despite a valiant
attempt at subterfuge, it was apparent that the young gentleman was
telling fibs and had hidden the coin. His eye movement was
consistently up and to his right. He was using the creative portion
of his brain and was not telling me the truth. Subsequent digging
allowed me to determine the location of the coin.
It
seemed like a miracle to them, but all I did was pay attention to
their eyes.
Now, several of you have asked me about detecting dishonesty. You'll be pleased to know that over the next few weeks, we will dig into this subject a lot more.
Remember, pay attention to the little things, and you will have a much more comprehensive picture of the world around you.
Best,
Atlas
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